Doyle and Holmes, Part 1

The following was voted by a group of scholars to be 'the funniest joke ever':

Sherlock Holmes and Watson go on a fishing trip. As they bed down for the night, Holmes says, "Watson, look up into the sky and tell me what you see." Watson replies, "I see millions of stars." Holmes asks, "And what does that tell you?" Watson: "Astronomically, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, it tells me that God is great and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"

"Watson, you idiot," Holmes says. "Somebody stole our tent."

* * *

In 1888, a series of gruesome murders rocked the Whitechapel District of London. At least 7 killings were attributed to the unknown assailant who was called "Jack the Ripper." All of the victims were prostitutes, and all except one killed while plying their trade on public streets. The methods of killing were not in every case identical, but in each case the throat was slit and in most the bodies were mutilated by someone possessing considerable knowledge of human anatomy. Unusual -- though futile -- efforts were made to trap the killer. Hundreds of suspects were interviewed. Bloodhounds were put into service. Even the eyes of one of the victims were photographed on the theory (not yet discredited) that the image of the murderer might be recorded on the retinas of the murdered woman.

Throughout the investigation, the authorities received taunting notes from someone purporting to be the murderer. On one occasion, half a human kidney, which may have been removed from the body of a victim, was mailed to the police. Few cases have so captured the attention and imagination of the public both in England and America. "Jack the Ripper" has provided themes for many literary and theatrical productions.

The identity of "Jack" and the motivation for his (her?) crimes have proved tempting subjects for speculation. Many hypotheses have been advanced but none generally accepted. Mystery writer Patricia Cornwell famously attempted it in 2002, accusing Walter Sickert, a painter, something Jean Overton Fuller also did in 1990. But these conclusions were criticized, and other theories emerged that a crazy midwife and abortionist -- Jill the Ripper -- was responsible. But I digress.

With Jack the Ripper painting Whitechapel red, and Irish nationalists planting bombs in Scotland Yard, the public no longer asked "why do we need cops?" but "Why aren't the cops doing anything?" The public was ready for a new detective hero, someone who would stand for justice and reason in an age of incompetence and chaos, and someone who would do it with pluck and flair.

The public was ready for Sherlock Holmes.